17 May 2010

A Shy Hello

When Heather interviewed me for her blog two months ago, she asked me about this blog.  I told her that this space in some ways serves as a placeholder for my future creative endeavors.  I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I don't want to lose this part of myself.

The last few months have brought about so much change.  There has been a lot of uncertainty, but I think we will emerge stronger as a family and as individuals.  We've found a home in Kansas City, and if everything goes as planned we will be moving there in about a month's time.  It is hard to express how many times we have run through lists of the benefits and the drawbacks of this move.  If we were to put the list on paper, we come up with so many variables...and find that this element can't really be compared to that one.  You can't compare a handful of good friends in one state to a handful of friends in the other and decide that one group is better than the other.

Some things are easier to weigh...I'd take the moderate weather and heavy snowfalls here over the humid hot summers, tornadoes, and ice storms of Missouri any day.  I'd take our natural foods stores here over the shelves of jarred gravy there.  (No, seriously, the grocery store near my parents has about 10 different brands of gravy in jars.)  Of course there is nothing in Missouri that compares to the Rocky Mountains out our front door.  But the one thing Colorado doesn't have?  Grandparents.  Aunts, uncles, and cousins.  I think back to the wonderful memories I have from childhood, surrounded by the love of my extended family.  I think that Jesse and I both want to give that gift to our own children.

Thus our decision is made.  I am sad to leave the home in which our children were born.  The gardens we labored over.  The mountains out the front door.  And of course, the friends with whom we are so connected.  But this journey, for now, is the right one.  I'm working hard to embrace it.

I'd like to come back here and use this space for a different purpose, for a little while.  It's always been more of an outlet for my craft.  And craft?  It's not happening much right now.  Unless you count applying packing tape to boxes.  I think that's been the thing holding me back from writing.  My own limitations.  So pardon the diversion.  Hopefully I can find the regularly scheduled programming again soon.

I'm going to start a new little list up there in the corner to share some things I'm charmed by right now.  Things you might be inspired to actually use.  (Me, I'm just looking, and bookmarking for the future.)